Machete Don't Tweet

12:45:00 PM

Through the powers that be of local New Haven moviedom, I was once again allowed to pre-screen a film before it's public release. I just got back from a late night showing of Machete Kills, Robert Rodriguez's second installment to his camp action flick Machete.

I am a fan of Robert Rodriguez. I don't always love his films. Spy Kids wasn't my cup of tea. However, I find the man himself very inspiring. Back in the mid 90's I watched as four indie directors took Hollywood by storm. Quentin Tarantino, Robert Rodriguez, Kevin Smith and Jim Jarmusch all struck me as these fiercely talented dudes who I could relate to. Rodriguez made El Mariachi which lead to Desperado. I read his book Rebel Without a Crew back then and was just floored. This guy was doing things I'd done! Difference being I was too scared to do anything with the results. He took it a step further by funding his film El Mariachi by being a test subject for long medical trials. He sold his body to science to fund his art. This is a guy I could get behind.
* I believe there is a revised version of this book that now also includes insight from Kevin Smith as well!

Regular readers of my blog may know that I love a good fucked up movie. I mean there are varying degrees of fucked up: so bad it's good, campy, cult, art house, gore, shock and schlock are some of my specialties. Machete was kind enough to combine a little of all of the above plus over the top action and special effects. Fans of bad cinema and bad action sang it's praises.

I would say spoiler alert, but the opening of the film is pretty much spoiler. So suck it up bitch pants I'm just saying it, Machete Part 3 will soon follow. Machete Kills Again... In Space! You get a preview of this awesomeness right off the bat. Boom! One part Star Wars, one part Star Trek sprinkle in tones of Godzilla vs. Space Godzilla add Machete and stir!
So this film's existence as a part 2 is merely to bring it's viewer from point A to point B. You need to see this to go into the next story ark.of Machete in fucking space.

Now here's what you get with the sequel: You still get Machete - Mexican James Bond, loving up the ladies. You still get ridiculous tongue in cheek jokes. Lots of fun explosions and cheesy hilarious fights and deaths. You still get the old 70's exploitation look and feel. You get injustice and most importantly, action and vengeance. But there is a different tone. My fellow theater goers say this was still good, but not as over the top as the original. I agree, it was not. Still good in it's own right.

I don't want to give away the whole movie. But a few things I'd like to touch on.
The return of Michelle Rodriguez and (sorta) Jessica Alba. Awesome! I love when sequels give you details and even closure on a character.
Kudos to Mel Gibson - the villain, and his first ever role as such. He should always be a villain. I couldn't see him as anything else now. (As in real life - haha, zing!) He was very entertaining as Voz, the visionary high tech millionaire bad guy.
El Camaleon - an awesome cheesetastic semi brilliant idea. One character played by four actors: Walton Goggins, Cuba Gooding Jr., Lady Gaga and Antonio Banderas. A comic bookesque villain who kills anyone who sees it and then changes it's face... I am a Gaga fan, so very cool to see her on the screen. I only wish she'd had more lines.
Machete does in fact now embrace texting! But Machete don't tweet.
Carlos Estevez = Charlie Sheen using his real name. Well played Carlos, well played...
Sofia Vergara is a psycho villainess Madame, Desdemona. I LOVE a good female villain. She even kind of freaked me out a little in the scene pictured below. I would love to see her play some more deep dark crazy bitch roles. She has carved out a new category for me in types as well, I have discussed sexy/ugly, zombie/pretty. Now Vergara brings sexy/please stay on your half of the room.

What I honestly felt this film was lacking in was the gratuitous sex. I know that's kind of a what- the- who- now thing to say. But this is like making a grilled cheese - hold the cheese. Then you just have fried bread. There were some fun bow chicka bowbow moments, but no wear near enough nakedness. Perhaps that is waiting for the unrated BlueRay version...

What you will get from this is still an attention holding ridiculous exploitation flick so chock full of stars that if you blink you will miss someone. (Actually while I am thinking of it, I am pretty sure Paul Mitchell of hair care fame made a weird cameo..) Perfect for a fun night out.

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